Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

It’s here now, writing to you.

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

Why is it after eating almonds when I’m occupied, I don’t feel mild itch, but as soon as I have nothing to do, I feel mildly itchy?

You are like me, then.

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

United Airlines Flight Attendants Lose Legal Battle Over ‘Reprehensible’ Sickness Policy - PYOK

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

The sadness was still there.

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

23 People Who Woke Up One Morning Over The Past Week And Kinda Sort-Of Accidentally Ruined Their Entire Year - BuzzFeed

Be who you already are.

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

I was tired of fighting.

Are there any guys, crossdressers, or transgender girls here who wear tampons?

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

And the sadness?

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

Why is every human messed up in some way?

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

Are there any Indian wife swapping stories?

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

Kuorans, what are some things unique to your country?

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

I was tired of trying and failing.

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.

Will my parents go to hell if I don't wear hijab, they tried to convince me and they provided it to me but I don't want to wear it?

I had run out of hope.

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

It’s still here.

'Housewives' Exec Assistant and Mom of 2 Dies 'Moments After Giving Birth' to Son - TODAY.com

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”